i have been one of those who swoon and squeal over hallyu stars. it amuses me how my friends diss and tease me for being one. :p.
hajiman (sorry, can't help it :D ), more than it being a source of entertainment, it's actually a newfound well of lines and thoughts that either make me glad or sad.
[omma (..abojji), saranghaeyo..]
my desktop is now So Ji Sub's domain. there in the wideness of my computer screen he reigns supreme. and oh, he is fully dressed. haha. months ago, it was Kwon Sang-woo and his glorious half-nakedness. kuraeso, the guy is a momjjang. i can't forget how beej rolled his eyes when i showed it to him. this time i am sure he would not. SJS is fine in his crisp shirt and long tresses. but my SJS-obsession is taken not on physicality. i have seen him in Memories of Bali and he sure has a decent acting. really, what made me hooked was a couple of scenes in MiSa (Mianhanda, Saranghanda).
just a short kwento, Moo-Hyuk (SJS' character) lived his life thinking that he was sent for adoption because of poverty. the betrayal of his lover buried a bullet on his head, thus, gave him the beginning of his last days. he went back to korea to find his mom with hopes of spending his dying days in peace. but, lo, the impoverished mother he thought is a well off, overly affectionate mother to his celebrity "younger brother" (who turned out to be an adopted son). this began the scheme of revenge to the mother that wronged him. it was revealed afterwards that his mother was told that the baby she bore was dead and cremated. never knowing the fact that she had twins (the twin sister was reared by an old reporter who has a grudged on her). at this time, he already set the wheel of revenge in motion: he succeeded in becoming his brother's manager, and so, conveniently caused him distress in love and health matters. the revelation at the end shook him to realize that as he was a victim of other people's unsolicited control in their lives, so was his mother.
The scene i was talking about is when his mother needed to go to the house for his bed-ridden brother and needed a driver. She saw the "natauhan" Moo-Hyuk in the park and asked him to drive her home still unaware that he is her first son. He obliged. At home, he "ordered" his mother to prepare something to eat. Despite, the rude impression, she prepared him ramen and left him in the kitchen. Moo-Hyuk cried in restraint and barely ate the first and the last food his omma ever prepared for him. Unable to control his self, he rushed to go out bumping into his mother in the guest hall and quickly said thank you while keeping his face from showing. The mother went to the kitchen noticing the barely touched food and unexplainably, started to cry. Next Scene shows Moo Hyuk watching his mother who is now in the guest hall from the glass window outside. There he made his silent declaration of love to his omma: that there was a never a moment in his life when he didn't love her...that if he'll be reborn..he will still be his son that she can be proud of. He vowed to the ground for the mother that he wronged. The dying Moo-Hyuk died in a motor accident but gave his heart to the brother.
the dramatic me being taken by such a scene hoped that his declaration sana were said in words. More than anyone else, his deceived mother deserves justice (but yes I know, I am not the writer. hehe.).
Freakin heartbreaking.
at 4am till what-time-i-dunno-anymore, i sobbed. i, too, despite my acknowledged flaws, want to declare my love to the two people who at times were quietly in pain of raising me; that sometimes, i hate myself because i am not the person they hoped to be; that there are times when you just want to come up to them and say that three words but unexplainably difficult to say, easy, though, when its a lover or a friend. (c'mon purge it out like a diarrhea.) is this cowardice? krum, just let me say it in the language unknown to you: saranghaeyo.
[life and the singularity of time]
The movie: MAUNDY THURSDAY
The actors: Kang Dong Won & Lee Na Young
The story:KDW is sentenced to die for robbery and killing the maid. Before his death, he wanted to meet LNY, the singer who used to sing the national anthem during early mornings in Seoul. It was revealed that his dead, blind, younger brother finds the piece to be uplifting. KDW and LNY are two bruised souls who unexpectedly "soothed" each other. The first meeting (Thursdays: visitation day) wasn't a breeze as she was with her nun-aunt.
KDW's character hates "good" people as this only validates how greatly a sinner he is. The rebellious, suicidal LNY's "I am scared of you" line was all it needed to warm KDW and KDW's "I am the best person to share a secret with (as he is about to die)" to comfort LNY. It turned out that
LNY bears an aged hatred to her mother who did not "avenge" (not the right word, I know) when she was molested by a cousin; that instead of giving her justice, she was forced in silence out of her mother's embarrassment. To this revelation, KDW apologized. He apologized to her for the existence of people his kind. The following Thursdays were days of renewal, each both beginning to see the pleasure of living. LNY sent KDW of pictures outside: the sun, the clouds, the ocean on a Maundy Thursday. But death was inevitable for KDW. At his execution day, he professed his love to LNY who was behind the tainted glass barrier. He began to sing the anthem which he hoped would uplift him to no avail. Then, the deathly signal came. For a moment, there was hope (for the viewers) when a guard hesitated to press the red button. But what is the reluctance of one man to the determination of men's law? So death came upon the sinner KDW.
Whenever I am tired of hoping, a constant question is: what if all that you were hoping and working (and denied) for all your life come to you at a time when there is no enough time to steep in its pleasure? should you be glad that it's finally given to you or sad that it is no longer the most cherished but time?
Men's tale of existence are all different, so they say. Some began with love, some with malice. Some with abundance, some with shortage. But all cannot escape sorrow. All, at one point, fell from grace; that the end is about whether you finally make amends with your fallen self. Sad truth is, time is irrecoverable. "Starting over" is more of a gift than a right; that at the end, just the knowledge of self-redemption is the consolation.
[kwenchanayo]
..seemed that i got too "babad"? Hahaha. It's all right, my chinggu, right?
